


Follow the North Star

by EvienStark



Category: The Walking Dead (Telltale Video Game)
Genre: Angst, F/M, Louis has been through some shit okay, PTSD, Romance, Timeskip, Trauma, Will Add More Later, finding your home again, survivor's guilt
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-18
Updated: 2019-01-18
Packaged: 2019-10-12 02:37:07
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,246
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17459006
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/EvienStark/pseuds/EvienStark
Summary: Louis has been running for so long now he can barely remember what it's like to not be on the move. Louis has been alone for so long now he can barely remember the sound of his own voice. He's been desperately trying to find a peaceful community that everyone's been whispering about right before all killing each other. He's come so far he just can't give up. He wants to be home again after everything he's been through. He just may have some growing pains while adjusting to a life that seems almost too perfect. Too normal. But maybe someone will be able help him readjust...





	Follow the North Star

He was a danger to himself and others. That’s what they’d say. Again and again and again… until he really started to believe it. Tonight was no different. Alone and so close to freezing to death in a seemingly abandoned portion of the world, tucked in on his side, only asleep enough to let his thoughts drift in places he didn’t want them to.

 _Ericson’s._  
_Marlon._  
_The Delta raid._  
_Clem._  
_Violet._  
_AJ-_

Louis sat up with a sheen of sweat covering his forehead and a startled shout stuck in his throat. Only stopped by the fist he half jammed in his mouth. Something rustled among the dried, broken leaves on the ground. A groan of the dead. When would his nightmares actually get him killed?

It had been so long ago. So long ago he barely knew how old he was at this point. How many years had passed since they’d been forcibly broken up? How much time had passed since everything had been destroyed? Pondering on it all wouldn’t slow his breathing. It wouldn’t bring his heart rate down. It wouldn’t keep him safe. That something was moving closer.

In his panic he followed the crushing edge of anxiety, getting out of his sleeping bag and shoving everything in his knapsack, throwing it over his shoulder, and making a mad scramble. Away. Just away from there.

Running.  
He was always running.

Finding the edge of the clearing, finally escaping forest he’d been lost in for days, maybe even weeks, he stopped in the illumination of the pale moonlight, crouching with his hands to his knees, just begging himself to catch his breath. Wisping out in the air in front of him as he lifted his head, he only took a tiny moment to admire the vast plains in front of him, covered in undisturbed, fresh snow. He’d been lucky to survive these past couple of weeks. While everything else had the advantage of hiding in between dense trees, it worked just as well for him.

While the openness of the expanse before him was beautiful for but a brief few moments, the anxiety curled in swiftly after. Anything could happen out here. No cover. Nowhere to hide. No one to help. _No one to help_. A thought that rang stronger than any of the others. He didn’t like being alone. He didn’t want to be alone anymore. He had no idea the dream he was chasing. Homes didn’t work out. Groups didn’t work out.

Nothing worked out.

But this wasn’t working, either. He’d known that for a long time. Really he just itched for a bed, a real one. Not just plastic-y covers thrown on the ground. He wanted walls. He wanted safety. He wanted…

People.

More than anything, no matter what the trouble being in a group caused, Louis wanted a family again. He was so lonely. He thought he’d learned that was stupid. That would only get him hurt in the end, like the other times before. But he hadn’t. He just wanted someone. Anyone. Lots of ones. He’d broken his family. He’d been reborn into another. He’d practically died there, too. And yet his heart still yearned for it.

Every second of every day that he didn’t talk to anyone but himself. And that had been for a while now. He just wanted someone to be with him. To enjoy the fresh crunch of snow beneath their boots as they walked beneath a starry sky. Instead he was alone. Always alone. And couldn’t find beauty in a landscape without anyone else to enjoy it with.

But that was stupid and dumb, he tried desperately to fool himself. Being in a group was only going to cause problems all over again. People only looked out for themselves when tested at their very core, something he had to very painfully learn. But still…

_But still…_

He’d been lost for more than a few months now, wandering around desolate, snowy countryside. Only on the suspicion that whispers he’d heard long before were more than fairy tale. And, if they weren’t… well, then he was right back where he started. Every single day he figured that’s where he’d always been, seeing as he’d made absolutely no progress. The only people he’d seen were dead or causing trouble he wanted no part of, and less and less of the latter the further north he went. Which was nice, truly… sort of.

There was only so much gurgling of the damned he could take before he needed to sing to himself to remind himself he had a voice. He owned words. That noises were okay sometimes… that they still existed. That _he_ still existed. But sometimes he thought he must have died a long time ago and had ever since been in hell. If he believed in that sort of thing. But even thinking of that made him pang with emptiness, thinking of Tenn and his mythical, sweet beyond… why couldn’t he have ended up there…

His mind must have been going again, after another grueling set of hours wandering still into that seeming nothingness. The sun was up, but not even close to warming him. In the far distance there was smoke billowing up and up and up… Louis’ heart seized.

That was good.  
That was very bad.  
  
Smoke meant fire.  
Fire meant people.

An instinct he was still warring with urged him to turn the other way and run until he couldn’t breathe. But… if he didn’t check it out, what was all this for? Sure, it could be a trap. It could be the worst thing that’s ever happened to him in his life. There was always a chance something would vie for that position. Sure. But… _but…_

Instead of turning he betrayed his learned, better sense and ran towards it. One leg after the other, over and over until his lungs burned and his muscles ached. Why was he suddenly so desperate? Why now and never before? He wasn’t sure. Maybe he really was done with being alone, with this existence he’d been forced into, with everything he’d become-

And then on the horizon like someone had been listening all along, he was finally rewarded. Walls. Big, solid walls, looming above everything else. That was a community. It had to be. And his excited stupidity nearly cost him everything as he ran some more. Somewhere to be. Things to do. _People_ to talk to. To make laugh. God, he missed the sound of other people laughing. Maybe even his own fucking laughter. Unbelievable the thought, but there it was, forcing a smile to his face, maybe even a sheen of wetness to his eyes.

Was this what he’d been looking for all this time? This mythical community that was welcoming and kind? Or had he made that up in the hopes he’d belong somewhere again one day?

All too soon the answer came.

“Don’t take another step closer.” The voice wasn’t shouting, as all smart voices did these days, but it was projecting across a field. And the person it came from seemed none too friendly. Rigid stance, longbow at the ready, arrow nocked. Pointed at his head, no doubt.

His hands flew up immediately, “Wait wait wait! Please!” Something urgent was suddenly bubbling inside him. He couldn’t put an emotional finger to what it was but it was there and blaring loudly. Something he’d been ignoring for a while now. Something strong.

“How many are you?”

“It’s just- I’m alone! Just me!” Sharp as his sense were now he could practically _feel_ her pulling that arrow tighter. Getting ready for release. Couldn’t be his white-hot imagination now… That was when he realized what it was.

More than wanting voices. Or people. Or laughter. Or a safe place to sleep-

_**Louis didn’t want to die.** _

“Please I’m begging you-...” All too easy it felt like his knees just gave out, sending him to the ground atop them. What better position to prove he was a miserable beggar? “I’ve been out here for so long- I don’t wanna hurt anybody- I mean- that’s not what I’m after-” Words failing him almost immediately. Now was not the time to seem like a potential threat. _Get it together!_ “I- I’m just _tired._ And _alone._ And I think- I think I’ve been looking for this place for a long time- so _please_...” He barely recognized the sound of his own voice. Not just due to the simple disuse, but the quiver and the intimate sorrow that laced every word.

If he didn’t know any better he’d say he was being incredibly pathetic. But maybe that’s just what the situation called for. He hoped.

Lifting his head finally, looking out beyond his locks, he finally caught eyes with the woman pointing the decider of his fate at him. And there his eyes stayed for almost too long a time. Maybe trying to say everything he couldn’t get his stupid mouth to say. Maybe, just… for a split second… admiring-

“What’s your name?” Finally she lowered her weapon, having thankfully decided he wasn’t a threat. So much so that she even slung the bow over her shoulder, and slid the arrow into the quiver over her shoulder.

So much so that she came closer. And the crunch of her boots on the snow was suddenly the loudest thing he could ever remember hearing in such a long time.

She was close, too close now, better sense warning him this was a mistake. The sickening heat of fire licking his face, the gut-wrenching sound of screams filling his ears. Of teeth ripping at flesh. Of guns being fired. This was a mistake, _this was a mistake_ -

“Hey. You okay?” She waved her hand in front of his face.

Things died down. She was close, but comfortably so. “Sorry… I...” He hadn’t gotten lost in memories long ago like that in some time. At least not consciously. He had gotten so good at fighting them down… “Did you ask me something?”

Frowning at him, “I asked if you were okay.” The hand that had shifted in front of his face fell palm down, outstretched to help him off the snow.

Finally he didn’t double-think as he reached out to take it, pulling himself to his feet. “No- before that. And also, yes. I’m fine. Fit as a fiddle.” Even his grin felt too out of use, like he was forcing it simply to remember how to do it.

“You don’t seem fine.” Unconvinced. But… for one reason or another, she smiled back. And it was the best feeling he could remember in _years_. “I asked what your name was, before that.”

He cleared his throat, wanting to give the best voice to this possible. He’d only get one shot at it, after all. “Louis. My name is Louis. And what may I have the pleasure of calling you?” It all came back so naturally. God… he really had _missed_ this. Talking to someone. Anyone.

And when she did it again- _making someone smile._ Was there anything better? “You can call me Star.” Only then did the both of them seemingly realized their hands were still joined. For what reason who knew? She saw people all the time. This interaction had to have been played out for her. But when she pulled back he felt that emptiness creep in so fast it scared him. “What can we do for you, Louis?”

 _We._  
He liked the sound of that. “I was hoping… maybe I could persuade you into letting a poor beggar like myself take refuge in such a fine place as this.”

She cast a thoughtful look his way, one he hoped wasn’t _doubtful._ A hum of thought escaped her in a sigh. “Well… that’s not really up to solely me. But… you can come in. Get warm. And talk to the people who would make that decision.”

“Thank you.” This was sharp coming out of him, harder than he meant it. “Seriously- thank you. Thank you _so_ much. You don’t… I’ve been on the move for so long. Thank you. _Thank you_.” Unable to show his proper appreciation. They’d need days for him to just say thanks in order to do that.

She turned, motioning for him to follow and his feet carried him without another thought. “It’s pretty lucky you wound up here...” Probably trying to do her due diligence in snuffing out exactly how he found this place.

If he was smart he’d let her in on what whispers he’d followed. But, something much deeper embedded got the better of him. “I’ll say.” Casting a sideways glance at her again, “But, hey… let’s say it.. _was_ up to.. just you. You know. To say if I stay or go. Just gotta know my chances here.” His smile this time felt more natural.

And there was terrible satisfaction when she looked away. He knew exactly the reason. “I just met you. How could I know?”

“C’mon. First impressions are everything. So I hear.” They stopped at the front gate and looked at each other again. _How he’d missed this!!_

She only half turned to push the big entrance door open, but still defied him by looking at him. Almost straight through him. “I think you’re trouble.” Yet her soft smile said it all. “But hopefully the good kind.”

Louis hadn’t felt this warm in years.

“The best kind, I assure you.”

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for clicking and reading! Another one of those times I just couldn't seem to help myself. If you like it leave a comment! I'm thinking of switching between reader POV and Louis' because why not. We all know where this is going.


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